What's on Your Mind?

Something has become my ultimate pet peeve; people buried in their phones. Maybe because I'm a waitress I get an enhanced version of this cultural bad habit but it literally makes me crazy. I see couples and families sitting in silence as each of them texts, emails, and surfs on their phones over dinner. It's disturbing. I want to shout at them, talk to each other!!

How have we gotten so sucked into the ever-changing, oh-so-exciting, world of nothingness? We get hungry for it-- we need our daily or for some, hourly, fix. Facebook statuses, sports scores, twitter, email, and celebrity gossip grasp our full attention, while people don’t seem to hold our interest.

Where has all the substance gone? I can't help but feel when I'm talking to someone they're only half with me, the other half is having a (or several) conversations via text or Facebook.

You'll never catch me so off guard as when a table actually stops to asks me how I am ... and waits for me to respond. Usually before I can even get my name out they're interrupting me without even looking up, "I'd like a coke and some garlic knots". The other night I had a table that completely blew me away. They were drilling me, asking about my life and school and me. They were so genuine and kind. It was the most odd feeling to have strangers actually care about me. It was lovely.

It got me thinking, why is it that we don't seek out relationships with people? Why is it that we care more about the online personalities and statuses than the personalities of real life humans we encounter every day?

What if, like Facebook's famous tagline, we asked every person we encountered today, "what's on your mind?". We might be able to extend a word of encouragement, maybe a hug or just a smile and a nice to meet you, but I guarantee you would catch a lot of people off guard. Leave them astounded that someone cared enough to look them in the eyes, unplug from their own little world to ask them about theirs.

Jesus was an awesome example of relationship building, he was constantly engaging with strangers. Jesus hung out with the "lowest of the low" in the context of his culture. He loved them, ate with them, forgave them, and blessed them. But I'd like to note that God was seeking relationships long before that. I'd say it started, well, the day Adam and Eve ate the "forbidden fruit". You know the story: God creates heaven, earth, animals, man and woman. Everything is good and right. Humans have this perfect amazing relationship with God but then go and screw it up by doing the one thing He said not to. Here's where we see God's love for people long before Jesus. 

Adam and Eve knew they screwed up. They felt immediate shame and realized they were naked and hid from God (which is silly, you can't hide from God). The strange part is the all knowing God asks, "Where are you?" and "What have you done?". These aren't loaded questions so he can strike them with lightening, he seeks them out and gives the choice to admit they screwed up. This is what I like to call initiative-taking love.

In spite of their mistake (just a small one that changed the entire dynamic between God and man forever, no biggie), he still comes after them. He still wanted a relationship with them in spite of what they did. The Bible says God made them clothes from animal skins to cover their nakedness. God didn't want them to feel ashamed. That is grace at its finest. I bet that blew them away. They deserved death but he clothed them instead.

God came looking for us in Jesus. He removes our shame and mistakes through the sacrificial Lamb, his Son. He loves us enough to seek us out and allows us to make the choice to answer him. No shame necessary. God covers us with grace and forgiveness; people are more valuable than their mistakes. He doesn't just tell us people matter, he shows us. This is the beauty of initiative-taking love. It cultivates dynamic, authentic relationships.

Now it's your turn. It's time to unplug.

Put the phone down, step away from the computer and actually talk to someone. It's no wonder we go through our lives not knowing our neighbors, the kid who sits next to us every day in class or the barista you see each morning when you get your caffeine fix. Our phones have become a replacement for real relationships, face to face communication, and our investment in other people.

Look up from your phone. Engage with those around you. Be an initiative-taker. Talk to strangers. Listen to them. Offer kindness instead of a face buried in a cell phone. Blow someone away today. Beware, it might change your life more than it changes theirs.

God loves you; he's looking for you. Unplug and answer Him.